Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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