Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
