I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
