So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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