i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
A bitchslap is in order.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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