That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
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