You don't have asthma, your pregnant
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize
