Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Randomize
