theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Randomize
