i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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