I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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