I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
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