Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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