This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
