He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
