We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
