i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
