I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
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