Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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