her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize