I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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