Banned from zoo.
Again?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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