There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
