I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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