(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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