fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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