it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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