is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Randomize
