I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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