Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
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