I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
