don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
