Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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