Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
