yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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