U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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