making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
