if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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