so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
