The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
