Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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