Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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