I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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