I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize