Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
they're like a gay fantastic four
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
