you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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