i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
