If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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