piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
