She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
